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I cannot begin to explain how long I’ve been waiting to write this post, and as we sit on the cusp of a new installment from a galaxy far far away, the time has finally come. Begun, the car comparisons have.

A lot of people are rushing to put up what car is what ship, with seemingly no knowledge of either the cars, or the ships (the death star isn’t a ship, come on). Let’s take a look at what ACTUAL ships and their earthly car counterparts we see in the Star Wars universe. For continuity’s sake, we’ll be looking at the Original Trilogy’s ships (Sorry prequels. Well, not really) and the cars that mimic them that are geared to the average consumer.

X-Wing/TIE Fighter = Mazda CX5

The T-65b and later T-70 X-Wing and TIE/LN Fighter are the working class of star-fighters for the Rebel Alliance, Resistance, Galactic Empire, and First Order. These ships sit right in the middle of performance and power. They don’t excel at attacking their targets or offering the best when it comes to shielding, but they offer a wide range of functionality good for everyday use. The Mazda CX5 offers the functionality of an SUV, while maintaining the sporty feel of a car. It won’t conquer any off road trails or set lap times at the ‘ring, but it’s functionality is second to none during everyday use.

A-Wing/TIE Interceptor = Ford Fiesta ST

The RZ-1 A-Wing and TIE interceptor embody the same spirit of early Porsche 911’s; speed first, safety third. These are much more compact than their stablemates, and offer better performance and handling in a lightweight, nimble package. The Ford Fiesta ST is a tiny hot hatch from Ford, and is an incredibly popular choice for autocross racers. This was actually a very hard choice to make, since the Fiat 500 Abarth and the Mazda MX5 also embody the philosophy of the A-Wing and TIE Interceptor. The Abarth is more like an Interceptor in the sense that it has a timeless, signature, ABSOLUTELY WHALING exhaust note.

Y-Wing/TIE Bomber = Chevrolet Express

The BTL Y-Wing and the TIE Bomber are not built for speed. They are built for getting their ordinance to a target and not blowing up in the process. Slow, cumbersome, but incredibly reliable, these ships are the intergalactic equivalent of the generic white cargo van. The Express is THE van you see when you see a non-soccer mom van on the road. While the express has a disappointing lack of proton bombs and ion cannon, it does serve as the heavy workhorse of industries across the globe, making it the perfect mirror to the Y-Wing and TIE Bomber

Millennium Falcon = Porsche Panamera

The Corellian YT-1300 Light Freighter is possibly the most iconic ship in the Star Wars Universe. This ship is fast, it handles like a dream, and on top of it’s outstanding performance, it also has plenty of room for smuggling or hauling the kids around. The Porsche Panamera has near 911 performance (or at least it tries its hardest to) in a I-can-pickup-the-kids-without-dying package. The Panamera likely won’t make the Kessel run in less than 12 parsecs, but it will do 0-60 in 3.5 seconds with 570hp under the hood. The Falcon and its (hopefully functional) warp drive would be proud.

T-16 Skyhopper = Subaru BRZ

What is the T-16 Skyhopper? I don’t remember that from the Star Gate? Beam me up Scotty! If those are what you’re thinking, get out. The T-16 Skyhopper is the ship Luke Skywalker used to learn how to fly, and “wasted time with his friends before his chores were done” prior to joining up with the Rebel Alliance. Before coming into contact with R2D2 and C3P0, Luke was on his way to Tosche Station to pick up some power converters. What that means to you non-nerds is that Luke liked to wrench his own car. The Subaru BRZ (and Scion FRS) is a very common car for young drivers who want to add their own parts to and experience a slight bit of performance and learn how to race, usually on semi-busy streets in the middle of the night without mufflers. Space punks.

The Death Star = No. Stop.

This isn’t a ship. This is a battle station the size of a planet. The closest thing we’d have to this is how aircraft carriers are literally the same as star destroyers. No car, not even the outrageously sized Cadillac Escalade, compares to the Death Star.

Tydirium = Mercedes S Class

The Lambda-Class T-4a shuttle is used to transport important members of the galactic empire between bases like The Death Star (which is not a car or a moon) and Star Destroyers. The Tydirium was one such ship that was stolen by Nien Nunb (Lando’s Co-Pilot in Return of the Jedi) and used by Han Solo to land on Endor. It’s a fancy ship used for moving fancy people. Unlike other cars, the Mercedes S Class doesn’t show off the driver’s seat, but rather the back passenger seats. Built for executives and the types of people who answer the phone with “go ahead”, the S-Class is the ultimate in people moving luxury.

Are there more ships that are like cars? Yes. SO MANY MORE. This doesn’t even cover the prequels or any new ships we might see in the new trilogy (Kylo Ren drives an F-Type R #SPOILERS). It doesn’t factor in speeders, pod-racers, or other vehicles like AT-AT’s or the Blockade Runner. For the sake of not making you read 700 pages of borderline fan fiction, we’ll end here. May the force be with you.

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